10 years ago, I felt stuck.
I was unenergetic, unmotivated and unhappy with my body like so many women are. One day I decided to start running, it was something I told myself I could never do but I wanted to try. It changed my life. I gave myself permission to go slow and with every step and every distance I ran I saw a limiting belief I had about myself fall away. I loved and appreciated my body for what it could do & I saw that I was capable of so much more than I imagined including running a 100 mile ultramarathon.
Years later, after having my 2 daughters Abigail who’s 3.5 & Vivian who’s 1, those same feelings of doubt and negativity crept in again. My body was no longer the one I had before. It felt foreign to me. I felt weak and worried that I would never feel like myself again. I felt lost as I navigated this new role of mother and felt the need to be perfect. I felt a lot of pressure from messages telling me to do it all, to bounce back, lose the baby weight and get my body back (a body that doesn’t even exist anymore). But this time I knew there had to be a better way. So I spoke out against those messages and began to share mine which looked much different. It was one of self compassion, of rest and of celebrating my body for all that it could do. I took the time to build a strong foundation both physically and mentally and used that to build upon to feel more powerful than ever. I built up slowly and released beliefs that my body was weak and broken and saw myself for the amazing being I am. I felt limitless.
I now share this with other moms in my Ignite Your Momma Glow™ program. We are so often told that what we look like after baby is all that matters and that leaves us feeling like there is something wrong with us. That could not be further from the truth and through building a strong foundation, sparking our belief in ourselves & igniting our glow in movement we are able to step into our power and see our limitless potential.
The Embrace & Glow Effect
Shifting the focus to the bodies that we do have now. Beginning to change how we see ourselves. Beginning to build a positive relationship with the body we have today.
There is an immense amount of pressure on new moms. We are expected to raise a tiny human on little to no sleep, look after our household, and look as if we never had a child! This messaging encourages us to connect our self worth to how we look, when in fact, they are two very different things.
When we come from a place of hating ourselves, true change cannot happen. This can lead us to search for quick fixes that provide a temporary change but are ultimately not effective and not sustainable.
So I made the decision to not coach weight loss.
Instead, we shift the focus to the bodies that we do have now. To begin to change how we see ourselves. To build a positive relationship with the body we have today. Because, without this body we would not have our children and we wouldn't be able to experience life, to hug, to laugh, to cry, or to move.
Now don't get me wrong, I don't think that weight loss is necessarily a bad goal. In fact, it can be something you experience when working with me. But I do challenge my clients by asking them a question. How would you feel if you didn't lose any weight at all? If the answer is that they would feel bad or like they had failed, then I believe there is still work to do. That is not a goal coming from a place of love. We cannot hate ourselves into a version of ourselves that we can love.
I will be the first to say that this is not easy. We cannot simply flip a switch and love everything about ourselves. But it is so important to try. Small changes to our mindset may not feel like much but over time they build into something much greater.
When we are happy with who we are, and if our bodies are in a place to release the weight, then that is when weight loss will happen. It doesn't make us better or worse if we lose weight. Who we are as a person is not changed because a number has went down on a scale.